One hand over the other

"Rachel? Do you know where the thermometer is?"

"Umm yeah mom...your looking right at it." and so she giggles.

"Oh." Not really realizing that i had actually been staring at it the whole time.

100.9

Ew..for me...that is a fever since my temp is normally low. I don't get sick very often, I can usually fight it off or deny my way through it. Strong willed, is an understatement.

No wonder I couldn't get out of bed this morning. I feel yucky. Cruddy...my daughters cold from this last week has put it's grimy little hands all over me. I thought my euphoria this morning, when I got the 8am wake up call from my best friend...grrr., was because of the night-time pain meds I took last night. I am not good with any sort of medicine, my reaction to them is 10 fold the norm. I can take 3 ibuprofen and call it a prescription. Anyway...this post should be interesting. I stayed in bed till 11am, have been up 3 hours and am feeling like I could fall over at any moment.

I think I have pushed myself too far this past couple weeks. Not that anything I deal with is of utmost importance or trying, to say the least. Much more exists in this world than my petty little issues. Work has just been tough and I have been trying to give my all regardless of my own needs and the people in my life, as you may have read, are difficult too. The week before last, I had one of those little boogers that hurt like a....well to be nice...like hell. I actually had to pull over and stop the car, remind myself to breathe, and offer explanation to my daughter that didn't know what was wrong with her mom. I knew it was going to be bad this time. The days leading up to it where strained. Nausea, dizziness, pain...and just a general feeling of not being quite right. I took my vitamins, drank my water and hoped for the best. I have gotten to the point where it is more of an annoyance than anything of substance to live my life by. It just is. Yet another lesson in acceptance. And the fact that I have a daughter is a miracle unto itself, so the Dr. confirms. Gratefulness, is not a new emotion for me.

And speaking of grateful, I am glad she is content playing on her own, while mom lays in bed motionless, drifting in and out of sleep.