I finally answered his email. The one he sent last week, apologizing for not contacting me. He said he was confused. He didn't know what he wanted. Well...buddy...your 43. And you don't know what you want? You don't know what is important and real? I am sorry. But I heard the same things from a 30 year old, not too long ago, and it didn't go over to well with me then, either. Obviously, it isn't me you do want. So move along. I am not going to wait around till he decides, only to find myself set aside. Again. I am worth more than some "I don't know what I feel." I am not...going to let myself feel that kind of hurt again.
I had tried to lay down and sleep. But I had that nasty flashback thing where you find yourself in a moment past.
"You know where to find me." he said as he stood at my door. "I won't come looking." I snapped back. All the while thinking 'cause he will be with another woman'.
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