Hawaii

Welp. So much for a vaca. I spent about 2 hours on the tele with my boss and ended up having to go in anyway. He was panicked. For no good reason of course. He just didn't know how to do something so it was placed on me. And, because I lack boundries, I couldn't leave it to his abilities or at least him trying to discover some.
I am also wondering about this person I am dating. Maybe it is just my fears showing their ugly faces or I am dead on, yet again. So tell me? Do all men use women to just satisfy their needs and keep their eyes out for something better? Seems to be the only conclusion I can come to. All by example.

So, I come home and here is my email...Hmmm makes a person think.

My Daily OM

Good Fences Make Good Neighbors
Setting Boundaries

In a world of so many outside influences, it can be difficult to know where you begin and the world ends. Requests by a boss or spouse seem more like responsibilities and it often feels easier just to give in. You might shrug off the words of a disrespectful person rather than engage in conflict. But what happens when the reactions and actions expected of you are not the path you would take? Setting clear boundaries is one way in which you can take responsibility for your own needs and help establish how those around you treat you.

The key to setting those boundaries is the self-confidence through which you know that you have the right to control your responses to the world around you. For example, limits may be needed when extra commitments present themselves at work, people criticize or are rude, children become demanding, or someone disrespects your personal space. When incidents such as these occur, firmly state your boundary in a neutral tone of voice using as few words as possible without apology. Then enforce your boundary by staying in your power and not giving in to wheedling or arguments. The easiest way to refuse someone is to begin your sentence with the word no. Realize that no is a valid response and that saying yes when you want to say no can only lead to resentment. Fear can make setting boundaries difficult. You may worry that saying no or abiding by your limits will cause hurt feelings, be seen as selfish, or make you unable to care for others. But when you are aware of your own needs! and create appropriate boundaries, you become better able to compassionately handle the emotional needs of others.

Like anything else, setting effective boundaries can require practice. You may feel particularly sensitive at first to how people react when you present a new boundary or say no when something has been asked of you. Start by setting boundaries with people who won't offer resistance and then practice your new skill in more challenging situations. When those in your life respect your limits, the course of your life will truly be yours to steer.