I spent my evening, last night, shopping with my daughter. Costco always brings such interesting looks. Especially on a Friday night. The store is usually quite empty, except for the older empty nesters not sure how to spend their free time with each other. A movie and dinner, I guess, didn't seem right. Or, those getting ready for some BBQ or party and this place has the bulk they need.
My daughter and I bebop through the warehouse, making fun of this or that, racing shopping carts and Oooo-ing over an item here and there. I get these looks and stares. I wonder what they are thinking...Is it so obvious that I am single? Do they wonder why? Or see it so plainly...I just ignore them and go about my fun. Part of me cringes when I see a family. A Mom...a Dad.. and babies wanting something so bad. Out to dinner we went. But not without seeing a few we knew. Small towns have their benefits and drawbacks. We headed home, before long and I helped Rach with her homework. "How many tablespoons in a quart Mama?" fluttering her lashes and grinning.
"Hmmm, well, 2 tbs in an ounce, 8 ounces in a cup, 2 cups per pint and 2 pints per quart. Do the math baby." With her homework done and the night behind us, we went off to the bedroom. She laid in bed with me and we played with the camera, taking pictures in the dark. Some were so funny and it was always a surprise to see what the flash would give us next. I laid there awake, thinking of how much she has grown. Such changes in a person, in what seems, a handful of years. I am proud, I am worried, and I wonder what the next handful will bring.
My daughter and I bebop through the warehouse, making fun of this or that, racing shopping carts and Oooo-ing over an item here and there. I get these looks and stares. I wonder what they are thinking...Is it so obvious that I am single? Do they wonder why? Or see it so plainly...I just ignore them and go about my fun. Part of me cringes when I see a family. A Mom...a Dad.. and babies wanting something so bad. Out to dinner we went. But not without seeing a few we knew. Small towns have their benefits and drawbacks. We headed home, before long and I helped Rach with her homework. "How many tablespoons in a quart Mama?" fluttering her lashes and grinning.
"Hmmm, well, 2 tbs in an ounce, 8 ounces in a cup, 2 cups per pint and 2 pints per quart. Do the math baby." With her homework done and the night behind us, we went off to the bedroom. She laid in bed with me and we played with the camera, taking pictures in the dark. Some were so funny and it was always a surprise to see what the flash would give us next. I laid there awake, thinking of how much she has grown. Such changes in a person, in what seems, a handful of years. I am proud, I am worried, and I wonder what the next handful will bring. I talked to my friend Debbie today. I told her of my dream and how I didn't think I could feel love for someone in the way that I used to. I said that with all the men I have dated this last year, not one of them do I feel I could or could have. And it wasn't with them that the problem lied. It was within myself. She asked me if I ever really have. I said yes. I have.
1 comment:
Oh my.....my heart beat is rapid and concerned. Not so much for this entry but for the last one as well...I'll pray sweetie. For lots of things, but mostly for healing of the heart. AND for the next few years with your Angel. Scary they are. Yet wonderous at the same time. Take heart though, the Lord is with you both.
XXOO
Post a Comment